Monday, October 27, 2008

The TV Viewer's Dilemma: Who to Vote For?

Well, first on a while back, it was clear to the TV viewer that this Obama/Osama guy was totally suspect. Can't vote for him, we learned, he's not black enough. Then, he rolls a gutter ball as soon as it's down the lane 5 feet when he tries to bowl, and that's a concern he might not be Polish enough. On the other hand, he can sure shoot some hoops, and that's what our guy is supposed to be good at. Oprah has confirmed him black enough now after seeing that.

McCain was too creepy from the start, laying on that bed in black and white with the creepy look. All the commercials ending with the creepy smile, even now, both Obama's ads and his own ads. Has a creepy wife too. Creepy, creepy, creepy. Halloween comes, though, that could put him over the top just before the election. Any kid who shows up in a creepy McCain mask at my door, though, and his 'Halloween bump' could backfire on him with me.

Sarah was supposed to get us with the librarian look, ala
The Music Man, if you've seen that musical. In case you were worried about her, that business of being a witch got driven out of her with the exorcist thing [actually the TV viewer might have had to go to you-tube for that one]. But then she was too easy to make fun of on Saturday Night Live and seems finished.

Biden, Mr. Gaff-0-matic, is busy living up to his reputation. Otherwise, Sarah has made that goofball look like a good choice. We may see an African witch doctor show up and work on him, too, I'm suspecting. Then the demon that causes the gaffs to blurt out will be driven off and Joe may have the edge.

The vice-presidential candidates are in a exorcist-off, and until that's resolved, the TV viewer just has to go by the candidates themselves. Looks to me like it's coming down to Halloween and the Oprah show.

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